August 21, 2015

With Ryan by my side, I gave birth (I GAVE BIRTH! Weird!) to our baby girl at 1:41 am on Friday, August 21, 2015. Harriet Louise Daly. 

The nurses put her tiny, wiggly, sticky body on my chest, and I squeezed her to my heart and felt all over her with my hands. I waited my whole life to see what my baby would look like, and it felt like a long time (probably only under an hour) before I got to see her face. The nurses had me hold her close, and I was unsure of when I could pull her out and away from me enough to see her. So I just felt her firmly, trying to understand her and the wild moment our family was in together.

I felt awe. To think we can really make other humans is still just madness to me. It seems like a silly concept. Ryan and I made a person. Her little body lived in my body. I tell myself these things all the time, and smile and shake my head. It's like the first time I saw lettuce growing in a garden- just wondrous and magical and a miracle. Something, someone, so real from nothing–well, two people who couldn't shake the curiosity of having a family, two people who adore one another.

She was due on August 18, and we were scheduled for an overnight induction the next day. We were supposed to come to the hospital at 8pm on Wednesday night.

Ryan and I both took Wednesday off from work, and we spent the day together trying to relax and enjoy each other's company. We went to Foolish Things Coffee for lunch, Ryan wrote thank you notes for baby gifts, and I worked on Harriet's mobile. My parents stopped by for a hug and kiss. We finished cleaning up the house, and we took Walter to doggie daycare. We had plans to eat pasta for dinner; I wanted to carbo load like I did before running a marathon. We were nervous and giddy, but mostly nervous. Scared. Excited.

I got a phone call at 4pm from the hospital asking us to not show up at 8 anymore, but to call instead to see if they had enough room. There were so many people having babies that all the rooms were taken, and they didn't know if they'd have space for us. We were very disappointed by this news, and nervously ate through dinner and came home to sit on the sofa and wait until 8 when we could call. We called, and they were full still. They said they would call at 10 to tell us if we could come in.

We were so full of nerves, we couldn't sit on the sofa any longer, so we drove to the mall and stress bought some clothes for our baby- a little dress with deers on it and a pair of pants with cats all over them. We also got a Sonic drink and drove around until 10:30 with no phone call. So I called them. They were still full. And they were going to call us some time that morning to come in and have our sweet baby. It felt so unreal and nerve-racking. We went home to sleep. But I didn't at all. We got the call at 4am, and went to St. John Hospital.

They started my labor, and other than one scary moment when all the nurses gathered around the monitors and were mumbling in concerned tones, it all went well. It turns out my contractions rose, but never fell. The doctors figured out what to do, and things started progressing.

Eventually Harriet came at 1:41am. I was amazed that my body just opened up and let her out. Ryan and I were parents. We are parents. To the most lovely, beautiful little baby girl. Harriet Louise Daly.

Life will never be the same. And we wouldn't want it any other way.